


Prophecy Boy

by Lysical



Series: Prompt Fics [7]
Category: Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Accidentally on Purpose Kidnapping, Child of the Prophecy, Gen, Jason is the sensible one, Jason's laughable secret identity remains intact somehow, Mistaken (?) Identity, Misunderstandings, Prophecy, Protective Team, RIP the helmet, Robins make careers out of getting kidnapped Jay, U wot m8, You can never escape it, for once, is jason's reaction to all of this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-13
Packaged: 2018-10-04 02:44:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10265852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lysical/pseuds/Lysical
Summary: Jason is the Child of the Prophecy. Apparently.--"You have been called to duty by the gods.""The call can fuck off," Jason replied, scowling.





	

**Author's Note:**

> For anon, who provided the prompt that i spent the longest time boggling over:
> 
> "*whispers* demon possessed Jason"
> 
> I still have no idea what you were expecting anon but it probably wasn't this.

"I leave you alone for ten minutes." Artemis stalked across the deserted warehouse, knocking some empty boxes out of her way with her axe as she went. Red Hood was bound to a chair, set in the middle of a chalk geometric pattern. 

"This kind of thing never happened to me before I teamed up with you guys." Red Hood tugged against the restraints. One side of his helmet had shattered, revealing half his face. 

Artemis broke the lines of chalk with her boot. She was fairly certain he had been attacked by a mad man, but all too often those mad men came equipped with superpowers and she wasn't willing to risk it. 

"Stop lying." Artemis undid the restraints and pulled Red Hood to his feet. "You're from Gotham." 

"Well, can't argue with that." Red Hood shook his arms out and looked around the deserted warehouse. "Where's Bizarro?" 

"He went after your assailant," Artemis replied. "How in Hathor's name did he get a hold of you?" 

Jason undid the red helmet and slid it off his head, propping it on one hip and reaching up with his other hand to poke at a bruise forming high on his cheek. "Let's see how well you deal with some goofball running up and proclaiming you the child of the prophecy, destined to rid the world of the demon threat. We'll see how well  _ you  _ keep from laughing. Then we'll see how well you dodge the bolt of magic he fucking chucks at your head." 

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "You were defeated by laughter?" 

"It's my Kryptonite." Jason's head snapped around as the door on the other side of the warehouse opened and Bizarro came ambling in, one skinny occultist under his arm, struggling to get free. "Hey, buddy. Nice job." 

Bizarro grinned, tossing the boy to the ground carelessly. “Bizarro caught bad man.” 

The occultist scrambled to his feet, looking between the three of them warily. Artemis could understand at once why Jason had underestimated him. He was young and skinny, with thick glasses and wide guileless eyes. He wore jeans and a cardigan, a far cry from what Artemis had expected when Bizarro had informed her that their teammate had been captured by an occultist.

"I'm really sorry about this," he said, bright and earnest. "There's just been a little misunderstanding." 

Artemis hadn't been expecting that either. 

"A misunderstanding?" She moved forward, into his space, and loomed over him. He gulped and took a step back. "So you did not kidnap and imprison the little one in this warehouse?" 

"Um." The occultist looked over at Jason and blinked several times. "Him? Well, technically I suppose that may have been what I did, yes." 

Artemis stepped closer. "Technically?" 

He wrung his hands together, shuffling backwards until he nearly tripped over Bizarro. "The prophecy is of vital importance!" 

"Oh, here we go," Jason muttered, running a hand over his face. 

"Helmet," Artemis reminded him. 

Jason blinked back at her and shrugged. "What? He's already seen one half of my face, I'm not exactly Harvey Dent over here." 

Artemis shook her head and focused back on the occultist. "Quite frankly, you seem unhinged. Do you have parents we should return to you, child?" 

"I'm twenty two," the occultist said, blinking at her. 

"The fuck," Jason said, raking his eyes over the young man. "Really? You bathe in the blood of virgins or something?" 

"No?" 

"You don't sound sure about that." Jason grinned and stalked closer, backing the occultist the final few steps right into Bizarro, who reached down and seized him by the arms. "Let me spell it out for you, since laughing in your face didn't seem to get the message across—your prophecy is bullshit, I definitely have nothing to do it, and you have about five seconds to cough up an address we can dump you at before I return the favor and smack you unconscious, you got me?" 

"Er—just—" The occultist stammered, flinching as Jason drew his fist back. There was a flash of light and then Bizarro's hands were empty. The young man appeared about twenty feet away, holding both hands up in surrender. "I'm really sorry, but you must understand how important the prophecy is!" 

"For fuck's sake, you idiot," Jason said, and sighed. He put his hands on his hips. "If it's a real prophecy, why the fuck would it need you to interfere in order to fulfill it?" 

The occultist frowned, mouth opening and closing several times but failing to produce any retort to the little one's logic. "Well," he finally said, "then I would like to offer you assistance on your journey to defeat the demon threat." 

"Pass," Jason replied, shaking his head. "If you want a Jason that's involved with demons, go find Jason Blood and leave me alone." 

"What?" The occultist shook his head. "No, I didn't track you down by name." 

"Oh good," Artemis said, with false cheer. "At least that means the tattered remains of your secret identity have somehow remained intact." 

Jason pointedly ignored her and frowned at the occultist. "Look, uh, do you have a name?" 

"Elliot," the occultist replied, straightening up self-importantly. "Elliot Burlingame.”

"My condolences." Jason crossed his arms over his chest and scowled. "Look, Elliot, why the fuck do you think I'm the one in your stupid prophecy?" 

Elliot pushed his glasses up on his nose and stepped forward eagerly. "Well, the prophecy is very specific, you see. The child warrior of the prophecy will have a red crown—"

Jason dropped the helmet and kicked it behind him.

"—will be possessed by a powerful demon and wear an insignia of demon wings on his chest—" 

Jason crossed his hands over his chest, hiding the red symbol, and shook his head. 

"—and will have died and risen to a second life," Elliot finished. He paused. "Admittedly, I'm not sure what that last part means, but a lot of this might be metaphorical. From my research, you most likely started your vigilante career as Robin. It may be as simple as a reinvention of your vigilante identity." 

Jason stared off into the middle distance. Artemis smirked.

"Well, I'm convinced," she said, clasping a hand to Jason's shoulder. "You have been called to duty by the gods." 

"The call can fuck off," Jason replied, scowling. "I'd never be possessed. A demon would take one look in my head and not want anything to do with that bullshit." 

"The prophecy has spoken," Artemis said, while Bizarro clamped a hand over his mouth, a poor disguise for his snickering. 

"Well, the prophecy is wrong. I've already got the Lazarus Pit up in here." Jason made a sharp gesture towards his head. "There's no room for anyone else." 

"The prophecy states that the demon is a powerful entity that wields green magic," Elliot added helpfully.

"Bizarro help Red Him on quest," Bizarro offered, loyal as ever. 

"I hate everyone in this room," Jason announced, and stalked off, kicking the helmet into the wall with an echoing bang as he went. 

Elliot blinked after him. "Was it something I said?" 

**Author's Note:**

> Mate. 
> 
> Fandom tumblr is over [here](http://lysical.tumblr.com/). Headcanons posted there sometimes grow into projects and I'm still accepting prompts but probably not for much longer, since I don't want people waiting months on end for a fill.


End file.
